Since “unrestricted” private ownership of guns clearly threatens the public safety, the 2nd Amendment can be interpreted to allow a variety of gun restrictions, according to the Bush administration.
The argument was delivered by U.S. Solicitor General Paul D. Clement in a brief filed with the U.S. Supreme Court in the ongoing arguments over the legality of a District of Columbia ban on handguns in homes, according to a report from the Los Angeles Times.
Clement suggested that gun rights are limited and subject to “reasonable regulation” and said all federal limits on guns should be upheld.
“Given the unquestionable threat to public safety that unrestricted private firearm possession would entail, various categories of firearm-related regulation are permitted by the 2nd Amendment,” he wrote in the brief, the Times reported.
I Got What America Needs Right Here
By Jimmy Carter
January 9, 2008 |
The Onion Issue 44•02
Sometimes I’m a little stupid, maybe, a little slow in the head, so I’m wondering if you can help me get something straight. Maybe you can help me understand one fucking thing right now, America, and explain to me what in the Christ is going on here. ‘Cause, unless I’m missing something, this country is in the middle of a motherfucking shitstorm, and I have no fucking idea what you’re gonna do to get out of it. I mean, are you seriously considering voting for one of these shitbags you got here in ‘08? Fat fucking chance.
Way I see it, America needs a president who’s gonna somehow un-royally screw up the Middle East, do some serious cleaning up after you dropped your pants and took a steaming dump all over the fucking environment, and—boom!—restore dignity, honor, and all that shit to these United States.
See, I got solutions to all your problems—I got ‘em right here in my big, hairy ballsack.
You better get down on your hands and knees and kiss Jimmy Carter’s rosy-red Georgia-peach-picking ass and beg me to run your fucking country again, because there’s no way I’m ever gonna come to you fuck-knobs and politely ask you if I might please be a presidential candidate in your precious fuckin’ election. So you can just bite my cock. I’ve had it with you jerkoffs and your jerkoff candidates.
You actually seem to think one a’ these assholes is gonna prance in and wave a magic wand and make everything all nice again. Look at you, sitting there like a common fucking schnook and eating all their bull about bi-fucking-partisanship, and how they have all the goddamn answers. Let me tell you something: These fags are dogshit compared to Jimmy fucking Carter, all right? I was arbitrating Mideast crises when this bunch was still sucking on their mamas’ titties.
But who comes to me, huh? Fucking nobody. Why ask old Jimmy anything? What the fuck could he know about peace in the Middle East? It’s not like he fucking won the Nobel Peace Prize for that shit. You myopic pricks. Back in ‘79, I sat Sadat and Begin right down and made those two dicklicks shake hands. It was beautiful—I had all the pieces lined up and I smiled and waved in my best fucking suit and tie right there on TV. And what do you do, you pieces of shit? You screw the whole goddamn pooch.
Cocksuckers.
Oh, what’s that I hear? The weather’s all screwy? You got a global warming problem? Boo-fucking-hoo! I was telling you morons to turn off your lights and unplug all your shit at night to conserve energy in 19-fuckin’-75, for chrissake. Gee, I wonder what woulda happened if we’d all switched to solar power like I fucking did back when we had a fucking chance to do something about it. Think we’d still be sucking Saudi Arabia’s dick like a five-dollar whore? I sure as fuck didn’t get no fancy Oscar for that little spiel, though, did I? No. But Al Gore, that cum-sucking pig, steals the shit from me and now he’s the greatest thing since Jesus Christ made a fucking sandwich.
Well, he can lick my asshole right after George W. Bush, that fuck.
You want compassion? Somebody who’s looking out for the little guy? Why don’t you take a look at Jimmy Carter, ’cause unlike, oh, every motherfucking candidate out there, he spent the last fucking quarter-century building houses for the homeless. And what does he get for it? A fucking hernia. Some fucking gratitude, you selfish twats. You talk to me about compassion? I’ll shove a crucifix so far up the Democrats’ asses they’ll be asking me to buy them dinner and kiss them good night.
Funny thing about me: I actually fucking know shit! Not like these goombas trying to weasel their way into the White House. I practically wrote the book on collapsing bridges, inflation, and the working poor, fuck-o. I even got a degree in nuclear engineering or some shit. You know how easy I could swoop down right now like a guardian angel and solve all your fucking problems? Snap. Bam. Do it in my fucking sleep. Just fucking try me.
So you want me to run for president again? Yeah, sure, absolutely, I’ll do it. I’d be honored to do it—with my fucking dick in your mouth, you worthless scumbags.
You had your chance with Jimmy Carter, and you fucking blew it. So get fucked. Fucking country.
The only gun control we Americans need is who and who not this President sells guns to.
My, Jimmy — just a little uptight, eh? Dude, perhaps one too many Red Bulls, a little crank and a 6-pack of Jolt cola? Topped with a Starbucks? You write like you gotta a passel of ferrets down your skivvies.
BZ
Jimmy: another suggestion. Try Cuba. Your buddy Fidel is about to take the Big Dirt Nap and his brudda Raul ain’t much in the confidence department. The climate’s pretty warm and the bitches are toasty.
BZ
Jimmy, got your pharmacist on the horn; he wonders why you didn’t even mention anything about the post topic itself? Then he said: you’re off the Paxil. From now on it’s the 1,000mg Valiums.
BZ
I got the same comment from the same guy, not sure if it’s spam, but the article was on “The Onion” a humor post… Kind of funny too.
For the post….
GWB never ceases to amaze me! Next he’ll say Americans really don’t need guns, the Illegal invaders do, they are under threat from “Bad Americans” and need protection.
I wonder how the next Prez will handle this? I mentioned where we were headed in a previous post and when they start rounding up firearms… That will be the signal.
To All: I decided long ago that, as a cop, I would absolutely REFUSE to be part of any ploy to identify or “round up” those who had firearms, or to take part in ANY action that was against ANY portion of the US Constitution or amendment.
BZ
The States have a right to defend themselves, that is given in the Constitution Art. I, Section 10 last paragraph: “No State shall, without the Consent of Congress, lay any Duty of Tonnage, keep Troops, or Ships of War in time of Peace, enter into any Agreement or Compact with another State, or with a foreign Power, or engage in War, unless actually invaded, or in such imminent Danger as will not admit of delay.”
That last part is a negation on circumstances – the invasion or imminent Danger in which the Union cannot respond in a timely fashion. To have that there *must* be backing for the Citizenry to organize in non-standing forces, which is the guarantee of Amendment II. The States and their People can decide how to regulate themselves, so long as no one who wants arms is denied them without due process of law, that via criminal proceeding to ensure that lawless individuals or previous law breakers suffer some long term punishment.
That is the ancient right of local folks to protect themselves when the King’s forces couldn’t respond and that is backed by the Law of Nations, especially against those of no Nation who attack individuals and communities. Then even criminals may pick up arms to protect themselves as that is within the Law of Nature, not of Nations.
This is the root of making communities and Nations: self-protection. I am not against States helping the People to regulate themselves and have those who are armed determine if the use of arms has been unlawful…. but then I this strange idea that civilization needs to be defended.